Category Archives: Oh for Ducks sake

…showin’ off their silver leaves


We must, we are told, think of the things we cherish. These things are not infinite. We must not take these things for granted. And that is true especially for the aged hippie spin-dancer.

I speak of course — of the wooly-sock in August (paired with gauzy lavender skirt) wearing,1,000-mile-stare possessing, intermittent elbow jerking, inner-ear balance disorder suffering, hands flapping through the air; searching, ever searching (for the most desirable pocket of air?) — Super Hippie Spin-dancer.

Wherever you are right now, I want you to stop what you’re doing and find a venue for viewing this collective specimen. I happen to live in an area that is rich in semi-ancient hippie-ore: pockets of super strength swirlers dot the landscape. In fact there are neighborhoods where one can hardly stand on a street corner unwrapping an ice cream sandwich without someone appearing and grooving along.

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dog 1It is a truth universally acknowledged that a scruffy little dog seen in a park will end up in the can with you.

I was using the public facilities and the aforementioned little dog and his owner (one presumes) were in the next stall. He wandered over to where I was and his owner/companion/trusted adviser said “No no Snickers. No peeking — no peeking at other ladies.” and pulled him back. Then he came over (under) again but not for long, as he was pulled back and told “Stop that peeking now, bad boy, no peeking over there at that lady.”

Continue reading Installable

I tell you one thing…

beagles2I tell you one thing, buddy, I’m starting every sentence with I tell you one thing buddy. I tell you one thing, buddy, I think it will add not just a folksiness but a sort of authority if you will, an immediacy to my thoughts, statements, and as I said, sentences.

I tell you one thing, buddy, I’m not really sure if I should be writing  “I’ll tell you one thing” instead of “I tell you one thing.” But I tell you one thing, buddy (yes I added a “But” so sue me) I think this is going well. (And another thing, any sentence in parenthesis doesn’t count).

And I’ll tell you another thing, buddy, (still keeping within the spirit of the thing) I also wonder if I should capitalize the Buddy. I’ve often (Oops!) (I’ve often wondered if one should capitalize terms like pal, chum, mate, bucko etc. To me it looks better to capitalize, I have no idea if it’s proper grammar or not.)
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Tweeting For The Novice

duckduckIt would be a tedious thing to make my Twitter followers read my tweets then read the same thing here or on the back of the most recent issue of Table Fern quarterly.

I have three Twitter followers. Yeah well, what, they don’t matter because there aren’t so many of them?

Is everything a numbers game with you people? More, more, more! Is there no end to it? This constant striving and accumulation.

Can no one sit peacefully with a toasted bun, a nice hot beverage and watch that 1940’s MGM classic about the Bronte sisters where, if I remember, two of them fight over Van Heflin? (This just in: It was Paul Henreid.)
Continue reading Tweeting For The Novice